Monday, 22 December 2014

Happy Things: my water colour set.

Hello there, it's been a while!
I've been incredibly busy with exams and other stuff, which is why I didn't really have time to write a new post. I still need to post something about Yule (winter solstice) as well, which I will do once I've done my personal ritual.
I've been shopping today. I needed some new colours for my water colour set. Water colours are my favorite medium. It allows me to pursue my perfectionism and when done properly gives a painting a luminous quality that you can't achieve with oils or acrylics.

My professional quality water colour set was gifted to me by my mother when I was 11. That means that I've been painting with this set for 13 years already! Every single one of my water colour paintings is made with this set. I have made hundreds, if not thousands of paintings with it.
If I didn't have it, I think that I probably would have been dead. This sounds a bit over dramatic but since painting was my sole refuge from my depression I think that if I didn't have that, I would have gone completely crazy and killed myself. 

I painted 3 to 5 paintings a week when I was in the deepest of my depression. I filled my days with it as painting was the only thing that could bring me a certain peace of mind. I still have all those paintings in boxes in the attic. To be honest most of them are not very good but I don't want to throw them away, just as I feel like I couldn't ever exchange this set for a brand new one. I once thought I lost it somewhere and I was devastated - when it turned up again I was over the moon!

When I came home with my refills I felt the urge to clean my set. I have never done that before as dried up watercolour paint can be re-used and I felt it to be a waste of paint. Needless to say, after 13 years of use it was pretty filthy. I couldn't scrub everything off and some of it is just rust but I am happy with how it looks now and I wanted to share with you the one thing that most probably saved my life. It is rusty and butched and battered, just like I am, but it is still alive, well and doing its job. Just like me!

Thank you, dear old rusty friend, for all these years that you have been there for me when nobody listened. I love you.


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